Saturday, April 29, 2006

I Love this song

eh I typed a happy email last night after I came back from AMK central lor, and guess what, I lost the post, AGAIN. Nothing new. Anyway, I snipped off my hair yesterday and it's in a mess now. Going out to do something to it now. I hope I wun be late for tuition.

Friday, April 28, 2006

Friday =(

I thought I'd never get tired of it, that I will feel super elated EVERY Friday because it's the last day of the work week. But today, in fact starting from yesterday, I do not feel I am very happy because I am reaching the weekend. I think it's because I have kinda made a mess of work, and exams are coming already, esp for one class; things are extremely messy, they are super naughty, and their work is super poor. Haiz..... I do really feel quite stressed up. And my tuition kid, also another 魔鬼. Actually good that I feel burdened for them, better than 管他们去死。 But still, I dun feel very happy that I am so "not happy" when the weekend is already here. A long weekend for that matter, in fact. Going to teach tuition in awhile. Hope I will get my fee today. Probably with that I will feel a lil happier.

Thursday, April 27, 2006

7 things you may like to know

About me =) Saw my fren's blog writing that abt seven truths abt herself, I guess I dun get misunderstood that easily (not up to seven at least) so I changed it somehow to things that I can think about, to let people know more about me. 1) I'm not happy go lucky, nor cheerful nor always happy. Nor nice. =) 2) My Chinese is actually not THAT good, nor do I adore this language. 3) I love movies, musicals, plays, dance items and things of this sort, though I normally do not have the bling nor the company to go along with. 4) I feel I am a complex person who thinks a lot, sometimes too much. 5) I think I may be addicted to buying things, that explains why I so love to go out. 6) I love travelling. 7) I am lazy.

Of Colors

You Are Emerald Green
Deep and mysterious, it often seems like no one truly gets you. Inside, you are very emotional and moody - though you don't let it show. People usually have a strong reaction to you... profound love or deep hate. But you can even get those who hate you to come around. There's something naturally harmonious about you.
You Are Apple Red
You're never one to take life too seriously, and because of it, you're a ton of fun. And although you have a great sense of humor, you are never superficial. Deep and caring, you do like to get to the core of people - to understand them well. However, any probing you do is light hearted and fun, sometimes causing people to misjudge you.

When we can't figure it out, we have to faith it out

When my heart is overwhelmed:lead me to the rock that is higher than I Psalm 61:2 When you're overwhelmed it's easy to "jump to the conclusion that God isn't on the job." Here's on adversity: (a) It shows you how much you need God. It reminds you of your humanity; that you're just a heartbeat from eternity. (b) It produces character, refines the integrity of your heart and takes away the desire to play games. (c) It lets God use you by showing others that in their darkest hour He'll be there for them too.

Wednesday, April 26, 2006

Your Five Factor Personality Profile
Extroversion: You have medium extroversion. You're not the life of the party, but you do show up for the party. Sometimes you are full of energy and open to new social experiences. But you also need to hibernate and enjoy your "down time." Conscientiousness: You have medium conscientiousness. You're generally good at balancing work and play. When you need to buckle down, you can usually get tasks done. But you've been known to goof off when you know you can get away with it. Agreeableness: You have low agreeableness. Your self interest comes first, and others come later, if at all. In general, you feel that people are not to be trusted. And you're skeptical that anyone else really feels differently. Neuroticism: You have medium neuroticism. You're generally cool and collected, but sometimes you do panic. Little worries or problems can consume you, draining your energy. Your life is pretty smooth, but there's a few emotional bumps you'd like to get rid of. Openness to experience: Your openness to new experiences is high. In life, you tend to be an early adopter of all new things and ideas. You'll try almost anything interesting, and you're constantly pushing your own limits. A great connoisseir of art and beauty, you can find the positive side of almost anything.
You Are Animal
A complete lunatic, you're operating on 100% animal instincts. You thrive on uncontrolled energy, and you're downright scary. But you sure can beat a good drum. "Kill! Kill!"

Am I super open or wat to let u all noe all these (if ever they are accurate)

You Are 28% Open Minded
You aren't exactly open minded, but you have been known to occasionally change your mind. You're tolerant enough to get along with others who are very different... But you may be quietly judgmental of things or people you think are wrong. You take your own values pretty seriously, and it would take a lot to change them.

haha super diu lian. But is that the real me?

Your Values Profile
Loyalty: You don't really value loyalty. In your opinion, friendship should be earned. If you don't agree with someone, it doesn't matter how close you are. You'll let them (and everyone else know) exactly what you think. Honesty: You don't really value honesty. You do value getting your way, no matter what. And if a little lying is required to do that, no problem. A few white lies never hurt anyone (at least, that's what you tell yourself!) Generosity: You don't really value generosity. Your needs always come first, no matter what. And you'll possibly help someone else out... But only if it helps you in return. Humility: You value humility a fair amount. You tend to be an easy going, humble person. But occasionally your ego takes over. You have a slight competitive streak - and the need to be the best. Tolerance: You value tolerance a fair amount. You are open to new cultures, beliefs, and ideas. You have very few prejudices that you're aware of. And while you are tolerant, you do stand true to what you believe.

Pardon me, I'm at it again.

Hehe, it's time for quiz and I am going to flood this place with these. Not much of a meaning. Just because I dun want to sleep yet and I have nothing much to do
You Are Sunrise
You enjoy living a slow, fulfilling life. You enjoy living every moment, no matter how ordinary. You are a person of reflection and meditation. You start and end every day by looking inward. Caring and giving, you enjoy making people happy. You're often cooking for friends or buying them gifts. All in all, you know how to love life for what it is - not for how it should be.

Sunday, April 23, 2006

Stressed yet fruitful

I spent a WHOLE FULL DAY today outside. It's 9+ now and I just reached home. Ready to do work already though. But am stressed up as I think of all the work. But nevertheless, it was so fruitful time out today. eating ben and jerry's, strawberry cheescake, chunky monkey and some super steady chocolate flavor to be exact; talking about "interesting stuffs" at starbucks, intellectual and spiritual to be exact again, and kneeling down to pray. What a special day =)

Hehe, he's back

U noe la, I have silly links on my sidebar cos some links link to nowhere anymore. But I just leave them there. Hehe, but he's back*exclamation markS* thegreatesthigh haha, I think this entry is super funny can. So I copied it I went for a haircut on Sun....erm normally i get a cut once like two months. I dont really like going a haircut..coz sometimes the wait is too long..esp on a weekend. So when it was my turn, a boy roughly about like one year plus plus old came in together with the mother carrying him. As he was about to get the cut, he was crying and struggling and refuesd to get a cut, he screamed and refuesd to sit still. The mother was sitting on the chair and with him on her lap. So they took off his t-shirt and he start yellling and screaming. So thru out the ordeal, he was like crying non-stop. Then the mother try to coax him and ask him to talk....then she ask him to say " Thank You Auntie!" as the lady snip his hair....so the poor boy just cry and said " thank you auntie" and he cried and cried.... then the mother ask him to say " i love you..." and he said that and he cried and cried.....the whole place laughed as he was crying and saying all these things... haha very funny la.... It's nice to noe someone blogs as well =)))

Saturday, April 22, 2006

Just a great evening out

It's true, I am very deprived of wearing nice clothes I like, big earrings, big necklaces, bright blue contact lenses and basically feeling pretty, and, carefree. Tonight was one of those nights I felt was good time being spent. Nice theatre play, Furthest north, Deepest South which won the Life! Theatre Awards in 2004. Reviews here. Nice show, good, entertaining and also bought myself really nice earrings and bangles, etc. Good time spent talking too blah blah blah. I really feel I have a thing for plays, musicals, concerts blah blah blah But also one of those days I really dislike my spending habit. Anyway, I just wan to say, I enjoy tonight very much even though hiccups happened along the way. Actually only one hiccup la. Then of cos that of my spending habit. But still, I feel very happy tonight. =) I think cos I am deprived.

Thursday, April 20, 2006

It's thursday,

which means............ tomorrow's FRIDAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYyyyayyyYYYY hehe so HAPPY =)) Sorry, I still cant put exclamation marks cos of my spoilt keyboard, but I am still very happy Teeheehee Very happy la. Though I have tonnes, like really TONNNNNNES of books to mark now and hopefully can finish before tomorrow morning, it doesnt despair me cos tomorrow's friday, the happiest day in the week =) And I am going for some steamboat session after that at some funny person's place, so there, I am very happy I have some program on Friday night. Cm'on, Friday night's not supposed to be wasted away like that. Read some blogger's post on his phuket trip and got reminded of mine. I SO want to blog about it, but the photos are not with me cos my laptop's not with me. And there is that stumbling issue too =( We'll see.... Happy FRIDAAYYYYYyYyYYYASYAsy =)))))))

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

Singing in the rain~

I think I can finally catch a glimpse of the reason why some people like to be in the rain. I always think these people are weird. I mean why would anybody want themselves to get drenched, and cold, and have their clothes sticking to their body? Huh? Why? But today was I think, maybe the second time, I feel like being in the rain. The second time in 24 years. I think it was just too luring. The cold breeze that swept past my face, as if it is inviting me to join it to just "let it all out" in the rain. At that juncture, I really wanted to do so. But sometimes, some things, you just have to consider. I was carrying so many books. And, I was in school. I certainly cannot just zoom out without considerations. Life is just full of considerations. Everyday, you have to consider this and that. Sometimes, the burden just gets too heavy, and you just want to let everything go. But how is it like to let go? When at the same time you have to consciously do everything still? I am very tired. But I think it is good really, to have somebody in school to encourage you. Somehow, I think the English or maybe I should say non Chinese department teachers do it better. Maybe it is just not so "chinese", and chinese teachers for that matter, to be saying encouraging words, to just give you a pat on your shoulder, to just put their arms around you. But I enjoy such encouragements, totally. Especially when a teacher him or herself tells you that every job may just well be the same. And reminding you what we are really achieving in the end. I think what I can do NOW is to just tell myself to not give up. Actually, I think I like Chinese too, though I may not love it yet. I always feel Chinese is a very beautiful language. There are some things which you just cant be able to express with say, English. And this was affirmed by Zhizhen, saying not that Chinese is more superior, but in the linguistics term, Chinese has another layer property blah blah which makes it one level higher than English and thus more cheem. Just like the term 委屈。How do you say this in English? Get bullied or something? So, really sometimes, Chinese expresses things that other language never can. I think such things may be quite universal, just like some words French can express but not other languages? I dunno la.. Actually am really quite tired. But for the sake of money, I shall go teach tuition now. Besides, exams are coming, better be more responsible.

Monday, April 17, 2006

Just a short update

Many things happened last week or the week(s) before, I dun really recall. Anyway, I firmly believe God will make me a better person out of all these. I start to have 2 realisations regarding my job: 1) I must love my job then I will enjoy my job and be happy. >> I must LEARN to love my job 2) No matter how tired I get, I must finish my lesson plans before Sat because weekends are meant for rest. >> Finish lesson plans and mark finish my books before Sat. Be more efficient and grab hold of any free space I have to do work. Of cos occassional rest is ok la Anyway, I went to do this

The Five Love Languages

My primary love language is probably Quality Time with a secondary love language being Acts of Service.

Complete set of results

Quality Time: 11
Acts of Service: 9
Receiving Gifts: 5
Words of Affirmation: 3
Physical Touch: 2

Information

Unhappiness in relationships, according to Dr. Gary Chapman, is often due to the fact that we speak different love languages. Sometimes we don't understand our partner's requirements, or even our own. We all have a "love tank" that needs to be filled in order for us to express love to others, but there are different means by which our tank can be filled, and there are different ways that we can express love to others. I always think I am a very "touchy" person. Now I realise I'm not. Cos wats the use of touch you much but not doing anything practical... Off to prepare next lesson le =)

Friday, April 14, 2006

Not a super wow wow entry but really just happy because tomorrow is Good Friday and which means I can sleep in a lil. QUite a no of things happened these few days but which I think are good. Had a chilled out session with Tianmin just now at Tiantian Huo Guo. Really some time since I have such a thing, like huh, er chill out time? Mark books time lots of it. And some more, it's chilling out with Tianmin, which we havent done in quite some time. Still, good time it was. Much laughing and sharing, this is what I call really fruitful time. And halfway thru eating, somebody with those pro shooting camera came towards us. I thot it was some show or smthg and nearly ran. But they say they are just shooting some video for the restaurant. For what also, I dunno. We were then asked to say 这个汤真的很好喝 for three times. Each in request to be louder than the last. And we still have to kay kay eat first and after he say "rolling" we eat for 3 seconds more then turned towards the camera and say "这个汤真的很好喝". Funny why I was so spontaneous too. Anyway la... I bought 2 silly pyjamas at pasar malam yesterday and felt happy. I made myself a Lucia aka 卢西亚 keychain too. And also a colorful and happy winnie the pooh towel. SO haha..... I think I am happy. Buying things normally makes me happy. Especially when they are cheap. Ya la, dunno wat photos to post too, so just picts taken at Jacon's wedding dinner. One only can???????? Wah, I remember we took one table photo lor. DUnno where it went Anyway, all these 3 picts were badly taken. In my point of view. Image hosting by Photobucket Thought this looked the worse with Xiao Mi looking away and I basically looking like an extra standing in front so close to the groom some more. Image hosting by Photobucket This one, still. ROger, me and Shao's face look too cluttered together. And Liansi's head just basically looked, big. Image hosting by Photobucket I looked and I thought finally something better. Until I saw Roger. What is he trying to do??? Right, sleeping le.... night night =)

Monday, April 10, 2006

M-C-ized

Seen doc and he said I have mild anxiety... haha.... I just hope it won't develop into anything worse. Had 2 days MC. though there is still this responsibility calling out to me in that of my students' progress. But I think what that's more impt is my health. Pray that I will have good 2 days ya? Anyway just another and a half day more.
like something being dug out from the heart.... and there's this hollow space.... like some part of me just died.... like nightmare......

Thursday, April 06, 2006

feeling happy

The very not color and contrast corrected pict I took the other day with Joash. Doesnt look like him, dun u think so? And they say I dun look like me either, I think because of the specs. Yup, I know I know, happiness is not permanent, but I just feel that li bit happier because I jus had a simmering hot dinner (in office), reheated by the wondeful staff pantry microwave and I am feeling all full and satisfied. So it makes all sense that thing about being angry and hungry, though it doesnt hold true for all situations. And I think I am happier too cos I have just finished marking close 100 books, slightly more than that, and I certainly am happy because I know I have made life a lil bit easier for myself. I still got many books la. Which I think I will attempt marking tomorrow morning by coming earlier to school. I hope this really succeeds because I have been saying I wan to come sch early since Mon and have not done so even once. I really hope to finish marking before lesson starts in the morning so that I can have time to do my lesson plan. And go home to do my laundry, fold my clothes too (after 3 rounds of laundry) and basically be happy. And some babysitting at night. Yup, I think I should keep praying still. Off to tuition soon! =) (After I wash up my tupperware)

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

There must be

I'm quite, in fact very sure, that there is something wrong (still) with my sentiments about school. Because while somebody was advising me about my class just now, I could feel the tears coming out, again. Pastor Henry said, if I have overcome that problem, I would not be so, ie I would not cry. What's wrong? Do I really still feel very lousy over my teaching methods? Have I still not come into terms with the stress school gives or have I not accepted the responsibility a teacher has upon students? I really dun wan to scold them. I dun want to scream at them. How I wish every one of them love to learn. Even if not, why is there not just a handful who are naughty, but a couple of handfuls? In fact almost half the class' attitude is very bad. I talk, they also talk. How are they going to learn in this way? They hurl vulgarities, they walk around, like, WHAT!!!!???? The teachers just tell me, you gotta 抓他们抓得很紧。 I say, ya, but like how? Come on, I dun wanna feel like that for goodness sake. Pls dun let me cry again. Contract teachers work like shit because they dun have any experience and they teach like shit too. Why do people wanna have contract teachers in the first place? When they never even teach them how to teach, and then they seemingly "ruin" the children's standard. Pls dun let me fall.

Sunday, April 02, 2006

乱七八糟#·~#%·¥#—……%(*—……(*?

我的家庭 我的家庭五口人。他们是爸爸、妈妈、哥哥、妹妹河我我的爸爸做工我的哥哥在小学。 我看电视。 我们的电视大。 我家人在唱歌。

Yippy~

The page looks so much more neater now right? Though many areas, I already cant be bothered to make it nicer.
Having sore eyes now. Sigh, I hope I will be ok soon. And..... Tomorrow's church's 36th anniversary. We're gonna celebrate. =)